The BRO Code for Husbands

Keep dating your wife.

The courting does not stop at the wedding. It just gets a babysitter.

Say thank you for the ordinary things.

Clean socks did not happen by magic. Somebody is the magic.

Listen until she is done.

Not until you have thought of the answer. Until she is done.

Be faithful in the small things.

Your eyes, your phone, your jokes. Faithfulness is a thousand small choices nobody sees but her.

Take out the trash before anyone mentions it.

For some wives, the most romantic sound in the world is a trash-can lid closing without a reminder.

Remember the anniversary, her birthday and her mother's name.

Apologize first, even when it is fifty-fifty.

You are on the same team. Somebody has to pass the ball.

Compliment her in front of other people.

Bragging about your wife is the only bragging that makes a man look better.

Handle the scary phone calls.

The insurance company, the landlord, the guy who did not fix the roof. Be the wall.

Plan together once a week.

Money, calendar, dreams. Ten minutes on Sunday night saves ten arguments on Thursday.

Learn how she takes her coffee.

Then bring her one for no reason. Watch what happens.

Keep your marriage private.

Your buddies do not get a say, and the internet definitely does not.

Protect date night from the calendar.

If it keeps getting bumped, it is not a priority. It is a rumor.

Hold her hand in public.

After twenty years it still says: I picked you, and I would do it again.

Don't complain about your wife to other people.

Especially not for a laugh. The laugh is never worth it.

Don't keep secrets about money.

The account she does not know about is a crack in the foundation.

Don't give the TV your best attention.

She is more interesting than the game. The game has highlights.

Don't flirt with anyone else, even "harmlessly."

There is no such thing. That is the whole point.

Don't go to bed angry if you can help it.

At minimum, agree to be angry tomorrow, after coffee.

Don't say "calm down."

In all of recorded history it has worked zero times.

Don't compare her to your mother.

In either direction. Nobody wins that one.

Don't forget she married you, not your job.

Come home with something left in the tank.

Don't make big purchases alone.

The truck is a "we" decision. So is the boat. So, somehow, is the grill.

Don't go to war over the thermostat.

Buy her a blanket. Peace is cheap.

Don't stop learning who she is.

She is not the woman you married. She is more. Pay attention.

Don't let your phone sleep closer to you than she does.

Charge it in the kitchen.

Don't win the argument and lose the evening.