Get the plan before the parents walk out the door

Quick answer: Before the parents leave, get the address, two phone numbers, and the location of any medicine. When something serious happens, call 911 first and the parents second. Then take a first aid and CPR class, because an article can't teach your hands what to do.

It's 8:20 on a Friday night. The parents left twenty minutes ago. The four-year-old is quiet in the next room, and quiet is the sound that makes your stomach drop. You find her sitting on the kitchen floor with the cabinet under the sink open and a bottle in her hand.

Nobody can hand you a calm brain in that moment. What you can have is a plan made earlier, when nothing was wrong. That's the whole job, and it takes about ten minutes.

The ten minutes before the car leaves

Ask these while the parents are still standing in the doorway. Some will be mid-rush with keys in hand. Ask anyway. A parent who hires a sitter wants one who asks.

• The address. Write it on a sticky note and put it by the phone. Dispatchers ask for it first, and when you're panicking in someone else's house, you might not remember it.
• Two numbers. Both parents' cells, plus a backup adult nearby, like a neighbor or grandparent.
• Where they'll be, and what time they expect to be back.
• Allergies and medicines. What the child is allergic to, whether there's an epinephrine auto-injector, where it lives, and a quick demonstration of how to use it.
• The first aid kit and a flashlight. Know where both are before you need them.
• The way out. Which door you'd use in a fire, and where you'd all stand outside.
• The house rules. Who's allowed to pick the child up (almost always no one but the parents), and what to do if someone knocks. The answer is don't open the door, and tell the parents.

Then set your own rules, the ones that don't change from house to house. No friends over. No leaving the kids alone, even for a minute. No giving any medicine unless a parent has told you exactly what and how much. Decide these ahead of time. Writing your standards down before anyone tests them works for a babysitting job the same way it works everywhere else.

Last, make sure your phone is charged and your own parent knows the address of the house you're at.

Call 911 first, parents second

This is the part most new sitters get backwards. They call the parents, who are at dinner, who then call 911 from a restaurant, five minutes late and without any idea what's happening.

Call 911 right away, from the scene, for any of these:

• A child isn't breathing, can't breathe, or can't be woken up.
• Choking that doesn't clear.
• A seizure that lasts more than a few minutes, or a first seizure.
• Swelling of the face or throat, trouble breathing, or any serious allergic reaction.
• Bleeding that won't stop with firm pressure.
• A head injury where the child passes out, vomits repeatedly, seems confused, or can't be woken normally.
• A fire. Get everyone outside first, then call. Don't go back in for anything.

Put the phone on speaker so your hands are free. Say the address first. Answer what the dispatcher asks, and stay on the line until they tell you to hang up. They'll talk you through what to do.

Then call the parents.

No one tells new sitters this, but you won't be in trouble for calling 911 and being wrong. Any parent worth working for would take a false alarm over a delayed one. Waiting to see if it gets better is the only real mistake you can make here.

If it's a possible poisoning but the child is awake and breathing normally, call Poison Control. In the U.S. that's 1-800-222-1222. Canadian provinces have their own lines, so ask the parents to add yours to the list. If the child is unresponsive or struggling to breathe, skip Poison Control and call 911.

The small stuff you can handle yourself

Most nights, the emergency is a scraped knee. Know these.

Bleeding. Press a clean cloth firmly on the wound and keep pressing. Don't lift it to peek, because that restarts the bleeding. For a nosebleed, sit the child up, lean them slightly forward (not back), and pinch the soft part of the nose for ten minutes.

Burns. Run cool water over the burn for at least ten minutes. No ice, no butter, no toothpaste. Call 911 for a burn that's large, deep, on the face, or caused by chemicals or electricity.

Bumps on the head. Most are just a loud cry and a lump. Put a cold pack on it, keep the child close, and tell the parents. Watch for the warning signs above. If any show up, that's a 911 call.

Fever, stomach aches, and anything that just seems off. Call the parents. Don't hand out medicine on your own, even the "just a little" kind. Doses depend on age and weight, and some kids react badly to things that are fine for others.

Something swallowed. Call Poison Control or 911 as described above, and keep the bottle in your hand so you can read the label to them.

Choking is why you take the class

You can't learn choking response from reading. A child who's coughing hard and loud is moving air, so let them cough. A child who can't cough, cry, or breathe needs help in seconds.

The technique is different for a baby than for an older child. Infants get back blows and chest thrusts. Kids over a year old get abdominal thrusts. Get this wrong on a baby and you can do harm, which is why you practice it hands-on, on a manikin, with an instructor watching.

The American Red Cross and many hospitals, community centers, and fire departments offer babysitting courses and infant and child CPR classes for teens. Take one before your next job. Put the certificate in front of any parent who's deciding whether to hire you. It also gives you a real reason to ask for more money, which fits with knowing what you're worth before somebody else decides.

What actually prevents most emergencies

Water is the big one. A child in a bathtub, a pool, or even a few inches of water must be within arm's reach, every second. Drowning is quiet. There's no splashing and no yelling, so you can't listen for it. You have to look.

That means your phone stays in your pocket. Putting it away is easy to say and hard to do, but if you want a start, this piece on getting your hours back walks through how. The kids are the job. The screen can wait until they're asleep.

Beyond that:

• Keep small objects, cleaning supplies, and medicine out of reach, even if the parents left them out.
• Check every room when kids go quiet.
• Never leave a child alone on a changing table, a bed, or a couch.

After the night

Tell the parents everything when they get home. The bump, the spilled juice, the fight over bedtime, the fever that came and went. Small things are only a problem when parents find out later from someone else.

One more rule that belongs to you, not the kids. If anything about the house or the night feels wrong, you call your own parent, and you say so plainly. That includes a ride home that doesn't feel safe. You won't be in trouble. Call for a ride and get home safe.

Nobody expects you to be a paramedic. They expect you to be the calm one who knows who to call, and what to say when they pick up.